It's a little awkward.

If I like you,
And you like me,
Why the hell are we wasting our time?
Are you too afraid to cross that line?
I’ve been thinking about it

If we're all alone, aren't we in this together?

Don't walk away. lets let them see the mess that we became
Sirens flashing, here's the cops
Don't blame this on not having jobs but dreams
And I see things cause I'm not afraid to think outside the box
And now I'm shaking, I hope I'm making perfect sense
So place your bets to see where I end up
And oh my god this place is so messed up
Rip me apart to see my insides
Compose myself I'm not secure
And don't believe a single thing
That you have heard
Throw my pride into this fire
My confidence is dead, I'm tired
Who's giving up?
I won't burn out, I'll just burn up
And I was raised on excellence
Always taught to look my best
I don't wanna be just anybody
I don't wanna be anything you forget
Villains die and heroes live forever
Tragic endings get remembered
I don't wanna be just anybody
I don't wanna be anything you forget

They won't forget you in the end.

Only you will understand this

I miss you

There, you happy? I said it.
I
miss
you.

Now wipe that shit eating grin off your face.

All The Single Ladies

In away, being single does have its perks. Well I should know, coming up
this november I have offically been 'single' for 2 years, this doesn't include
'seeing someone', whatever the shit that means. I mean without a boyfriend.

And yeah, it does suck and sure it gets me down from time to time. But this
is me trying to point out the good parts to being single, and maybe even
making people realise that being 'alone' isn't that bad.

For starters, you don't have to spend money on anyone but yourself. Just
buy things for you, not on some boy or girl. Sure, no one is going to buy
you nice things, but so what? You've got extra money for yourself. Back in
the day before I had unlimited text messages, I was buying credit for my
phone so often, and therefore spending money on someone else. Then I
became single and wasn't texting him every second of the day. (I then got
a hiptop with unlimited texts. Best plan ever)

You don't have to worry about how you are in the morning. Crazy hair, bad
breath, left over makeup, basically just looking gross. You wake up and
have no one there which sure is lonely, but its better than looking like shit
next to someone. And you don't have to worry about them looking like shit
in the morning either, because they don't even exist.

For girls, and as gross as this may be, come winter time, you don't have to
shave your legs as often, only before an event, or when they just get gross.
But when you go through that prickly stage, no stress, because there's no
one that's going to touch them. Just put on some jeans, leggings, or high
socks.

You don't have to put up with their friends, or worry about what they say to
their friends. I used to feel so awkward meeting their friends and just the
feeling of judgment, and wondering what they're thinking about me and
what they're going to say about me when I'm not there. Or what the
boyfriend would say when I'm not there,things that other people don't need
to know.
Parents fall under this category as well. Meeting the parents is so awkward.
At least I find it to be.

You don't have to answer to anyone. Maybe it was the bad relationship I
was in, but I always found myself having to justify why I did most things.
Can I do things and not have to give reasons why, or really pay any
consequences now?
Yes.
Is it so much more relaxing?
Hell yes.

You get time for other people. This I guess may just be how my last
relationship was, but the only person I really saw for so long was him. I
guess it just felt weird not being around him, plus I kinda felt like I had
to bring him with me everywhere. Now I get time for my friends. And
friends are going to be there for a whole lot longer after he's gone.

When I learn about the other perks of being single I'll let you know.

I pinky promise I'm not disturbed

It's kinda like I want to somehow kid nap you, a way I wouldn't get caught.
I'd then strap you down, so you're lying like a starfish.
I'd burn off ever singly hair on your body, including your eyelashes
I'd slowly rip off all 10 of your fingernails
I'd stick pins in your eyes and ears
I'd make tiny papercuts across your toungeI'd give you a chelsea smile
I'd draw pretty pattens in your skin with a scalple, and then pour a mixture of salt and vinegar all over you.
I'd cut off random fingers and toes
I'd scoop out your bleeding eyeballs
I'd shove a tube up your ass then some cheese and set a rabie infested rodent up there
I'd dig at your belly button with a screwdriver
I'd pull out your teeth with pliers
I'd break your ribs with a mallet
I'd then walk away and leave you there to rot.

Our house, in the middle of our street

My mum keeps talking about moving to a smaller house sometime next year, and I cannot even stand the thought of that. I've lived in this house since i was 3, thats 13 years (well, i lived overseas for a few years but came home regularly), and the amount of memories that are here, I just don't wanna move.

I spend most of my time at home. Yes, I am aware of how amazingly awesome that makes me sound. But I don't need to go out. It's just me and mum here, and she's such a relaxed mother. My friends usually come to mine, I'm allowed to smoke and drink inside the house, it's basically got everything I need and so I don't see the sense in going out really. But because I am home so often, it just creates more memories that I don't wanna leave.

One of my earliest memories is right before we moved into the house, me and my dad went to McDonalds, got our food, then came here and sat on the now lounge room floor and ate it. No furniture, nothing. Just an empty house with nothing but a father and his daughter pigging out. Back then we still had the tacky pink capet, grey blinds and grey walls.

Since then, we've added a room, moved what's in each room, tiled all downstairs, gotten new carpet, gotten new blinds, built an outside sitting area, done up the garden, gotten new fences, gotten a new letterbox, repainted the whole house and well everything else really.

And since then, basically everything you can think of has gone down here. First time I did, well most things that are part of growing up happened here.

The kitchen is what I'll probably miss most, my bedroom coming a close second. But everything goes down in the kitchen. Sweet late night chills, d&m's, drunk dancing, drunk times in general, pasta fights, foil hats, fights, kissing, getting asked out, sitting on the floor crying, drinking tea by myself, midnight feasts, eating in general, homework at ridiculous hours of the morning, everythings in this kitchen. Which ironically I'm sitting in now, by myself, drinking tea, smoking, doing homework and just chilling by myself. I actually love this kitchen.

My bedroom comes a close second. I need to repaint my walls soon according to mum, but I really don't want to. When I was younger, it was all light pink, and had a matching bed spread and wall paper. I still have the same draws from when I was younger, which is a little sad on my parents behalf, but still. Next it was differnt shades of pink. Then there was posters and photos covering the pink because I was so brutal and emo and was all 'no! pinks a happy colour!', I don't think my coolness needs to be mentioned here. A bad break up caused me to repaint it, purple and black, with an inverted cross and '40,000 people die every day, how come you're not one of them' written on one of the walls. Another has black paint just splattered across it. Drunk times have lead to countless amounts of messages written on my wall in permanent marker. Then fights have lead me to crossing out peoples names and writing different things next to them. Just reading them every now and then makes me laugh, because I forget about certain things from time to time. I really do love what I've done to it.

I don't expect many of you to understand what on earth I'm crapping on about, but those of you that have been to my house will understand its greatness, and its memories, and just everything about how homey it is.
I don't want to leave it.

Dear boys;

I'm not hungry for your bullshit
so stop feeding it to me.
Try a burger, I like those.
Unless the patty is made of more of your lies and made up stories and ^-^ faces.
But please, for fucks sake, stop feeding me complete and utter shit.
It's not tasty.

Just so you know.

I loved him more than you ever will.
I love him more than you ever will.

<3

Wow, that's so nice !

I'm sorry I don't colour my eyes in with eyeliner

I'm sorry I don't put too much contrast on my photos

I'm sorry I don't type like a retard

I'm sorry I'm not a tacky scene kid